hi, i'm roselle
i've always been torn between wanting to tell my story to everyone and let them know exactly what is in my head, or keeping it to myself. the problem is, being outwardly unhappy pushes people away, no matter if they say they're always there to listen. i mean of course i have a couple of friends that i trust with the world, but there is only so much your friends can listen to. but on the other hand, to pretend everything is fine when it's really not is to lie to yourself from the inside out; to ignore who you are and lose yourself. so which is better? to have people thinking you are melodramatic or just seeking attention, or to drown in your own mind and live a lie? im not one of those people who are constantly depressed, i mean, im actually usually happy. either way, this is my story. this is where i can post exactly whats on my mind, and if you dont like it, if you think i'm pessimistic, or over-emotional, then i guess thats up to you.

Letter to myself. “You are better than this. Yes, you do love him. Too much in fact. You love him. But you don’t need him. Why would you need or even want a guy who leaves you over and over again because of his own insecurities? He knows it. He knows that you will always be there waiting for him no matter how long he’s going to take. Don’t let him take you for granted. You deserve so much more.

You are what every guy looks for in a girl. Understand that. You are amazing. You are willing to sacrifice everything for love. There will be so many other better guys who are going to come into your life and fall for you in an instant. So do it. Move on. Wait for the guy who will do the same for you. Wait for the one who will love you more than he can love himself. The one who will never let you wait because he’s too afraid to lose you. The one who is always there for you, whether you need him or not because he loves you so much. Wait for the guy who can look you straight in the eye to tell you that he wants to spend the rest of his life with nobody else but you.
Move on.
Stop waiting.
There is no point in waiting for somebody who doesn’t realise your value.
I love you. You will be fine.
Trust me. Life always goes on.”

im not perfect. im sorry sometimes i get a little jealous thinking that someone else could make you happier than i could. i guess its my insecurities acting up. because i know that im not the prettiest, smartest, or most fun and exciting girl. but i do know that no matter how hard and long you look, you’ll never find somebody that loves you like i do.

dear best friend, i love you more every single day. i wish you could see yourself the way i see you. and i wish you could love yourself the way i love you.. and above all, i wish your life is everything you deserve becuase, in my opinion, you deserve the world. i will stand by you forever. my heart will always belong to you. i love you, and i will forever.

if my life had a theme song, this would be it. she lives in a fairytale, somewhere too far for us to find
forgotten the taste and smell of the world that she's left behind.
it's all about the exposure of the lens, i told her.
the angles were all wrong now, shes ripping wings off of butterflies.

keep your feet on the ground, when your head's in the clouds.
well go get your shovel and we'll dig a deep hole
to bury the castle, bury the castle.
go get your shovel and we'll dig a deep hole
to bury the castle, bury the castle.

so one day i found her crying, coiled up on the dirty ground.
her prince finally came to save her, and the rest you can figure out.
but it was a trick, and the clock struck twelve
so make sure to build your house brick by boring brick
or the wolf's gonna blow it down.

keep your feet on the ground, when your head's in the clouds.
well go get your shovel and we'll dig a deep hole
to bury the castle, bury the castle
go get your shovel and we'll dig a deep hole
to bury the castle, bury the castle

well you built up a world of magic, because your real life was tragic.
yeah you built up a world of magic.
if it's not real, you can't hold it in your hands.
you can't feel it with your heart. and i wont believe it.
if it's true, you can see it with your eyes
and even in the dark. and thats where i want to be.

one shot at life. "I’ll go out there and make my mistakes. I’ll fall down, get hurt, cry, laugh, love, and get back up. I’ll stand on the highest mountaintop and go into the deepest caverns. I’ll roam across the world, visit the moon and swim in outer space. I’ll let my imagination run wild and let my spirit soar. Why? Because when my life flashes before my eyes in those final moments, I want to have something worthwhile to watch, with plenty of love and laughter, good times and bad. I don’t want to regret a thing and I plan not to. Remember, it’s not usually the things you do that you regret, it’s the things you don’t do and leave unsaid. Laugh out loud. Cry in the rain. Love with all your heart and soul. Get hurt. Tell the truth. Go crazy. But never forget that you only get one shot. One shot at this day, one shot at this minute. One shot at this age. One shot at life. So make sure your life is one you will enjoy watching in your final moments"
— Anna Floyd

hi stomach flu. just chillin here puking my guts out. havent been outta bed in two days, havent eaten or drank anything, and lost 8 pounds. truuuue. kill me please. it would be appreciated.

describes me basically. "if i ever push you away, i don't really mean to. when i tell you i don't want to talk about it, i do, i'm just looking for the right words. give me a minute, and if i can tell you; i will. i try to me a struggling mix of real and perfect at the same time. at the moment, i am working on that ratio. when i get really quiet sometimes it is because i have too much to say. i have thought of too many things to tell you all at once and i don't know what to say first. i get immaturely jealous of anyone who gets to see you more than i do. i miss you really easily...but i also like that we can be  a p a r t  and we are both okay. space is good too. i love the way we love some of the same things. and i love how we love entirely different things. my head is a complicated pile of thoughts, and fears, and cravings, and dreams, and this tangled up nostalgia for the past, and somehow the future. i am flawed and i am a human and i am broken and i am trying. and i am one person and i am two hands and i am one heart. and i love you. and i am so glad you are here."